Doing It the Anime way

Have you ever wondered why everyone in anime just seems so much cooler than everyone you know? Even the random people walking the schools, I mean the guys whose faces you can't even fucking see. Why are they so damn cool? Why does real life suck compared to anime? Well I've pondered these questions myself, and come to this conclusion: we just don't do stuff right.

Take tennis for example. If you're like me, and you probobly are because you're at this site, you can't stand watching tennis for more than 10 seconds. I mean that shit is just BORING as hell. In the anime world, however, you have Prince of Tennis. People have special moves, stances, fireball shots, fucking all out wacky shit. Now why doesn't Pete Sampras hit the ball into fireballs? Because he sucks. Thats why. I suggest the next time you play tennis, you light the ball on fire, make really badass faces, gel your hair to retarted levels, and violate your opponent by putting holes in his racket and shit.

Board games. Tell me the last time you picked up a chess board or a Go board for that matter... yeah because they're normally just boring. In the anime world, Hikaru No Go is blazin the gaming world, turning the boring old game into an awesome badass trend. You have like old badass guys slamming the pieces down, making pillars of light and shit! Fucking HAND OF GOD! Is there a hand of god in chess?! I don't remember the last time awesome violin music was playing and shit while I was moving chess pieces. Yes, we at Evasource took up Go, but in style (See the Go guide written by Platy for the details about that). You don't have to be good, just slam the pieces down retartedly hard and dye your hair fucked up colors and shit.

Why are anime romances all awesome? How come all anime chicks are super hot? Real girls aren't like that my friends (I'm assuming none of you damn losers have girlfriends anyway). They need expensive presents, attention, phone calls, gay shit like that. Anime girls just give it up for some reason... I'm not quite sure. (Then again, we're talking about alarmingly violent and charming swordsmen and shit so maybe I'm just plain fucking wrong). If and when you find a girl that looks good enough to be an anime ::cough Platy's sister cough:: contact us at Evasource IMMEDIATELY.

For that matter, why does Japaneese sound so much cooler than English? (God help any of you that watch dubs... I swear I'll find a way to ban you from this site). I mean even everyday chit chat sounds badass/cute in Japaneese (with the exception of all Pokemon and Pokemon related characters). I think English just sucks, despite it being means of communication between us (the webmasters) and you (the-bored-as-hell-couldn't-find-a-date-so-I'm-going-to-sit-at-home-and-read-Evasource-visitors). I estimate within a few years Evasource will be all in Japaneese. Sucks for you guys.

Forgetting magic, and all that other awesome shit that we couldn't imagine without being in a druggy haze, anime is just much much cooler than real life. So to those of you who say anime lovers have no lives, take a second and think about how much you suck compared to anime.